'Adult cowards:' abuse victim calls out Amish community at sentencing
- Jamie Duffy
- 13 hours ago
- 3 min read
ALLEN COUNTY, Ind. ---Her community expected her to be quiet about the abuse she suffered at the hands of two brothers.
But she refused.
“They wanted me to sit in ashamed silence for the rest of my life,” the young woman said.
During her second time at the mic Monday in Allen Superior Court, she motioned to the gallery behind her, packed with women in white bonnets and men with the familiar Amish haircut, their flat brimmed hats on their knee or on the floor, and called them cowards. Her words were "the adult cowards behind me."
Rebecca Grove, Allen County deputy prosecutor, handled the case.
The victim, E., talked about being ostracized from the Amish community, the ones who wanted her to shut up and endure.
One of those was her older sister, whom she adored, and the wife of one of the brothers.
“She was my best friend. We did everything together. She was my superhero,” E. said.
When James first came around courting her sister, the whole family accepted him.
Original story here:
“We all loved him. He went fishing with my brothers,” E. said.
Then James asked E. if “someone had touched her before.” When she told him yes, he confirmed it was his brother, Chris.
“Then he went on to do the same thing,” E. told Judge Zent. “He was supposed to protect me.”
A father figure, who took E. under his wing when no one else would, took the mic twice to denounce the attitude in his own community.
“She had no support from the people that should have been there to protect her. When we’re caught doing things….then quit attacking the victim. Clearly, before the Lord, we need to do better.”
Because he chose to take E.’s side, he and his wife were treated like outcasts.
“My wife was (known as) an evil person because we didn’t trust our daughters with them.” This man said he “begged with these men,” to do something about the abuse and “then something else would come up.”
One of the defendants’ wives got up to speak for her husband, the other had a letter read out loud because she was too emotional to speak.
Both wives were worried about financial hardship and maintaining the family enterprises with their husbands away in prison. Both men have children.
James could barely read his statement after he choked up relating how one of his young children nearly died recently. His attorney, Gregory Ridenour, fetched some tissues so he could wipe his eyes.
Ridenour is the attorney for both Chris and James Graber and is representing them in their DeKalb County cases as well. There is another victim. Ridenour told Zent that the matter had been taken up with the Amish elders.
Ridenour advocated for a more lenient sentence because the men had shown remorse and gotten counseling for their actions. With no prior criminal record, both men hoped for mercy.
But Judge Zent said the community was one thing, Indiana law another. And both men had signed plea deals stipulating the amount of time they are to serve.
“I’m a judge for Indiana law. If you live in Indiana, you’ve got to follow the Indiana law, not what your elders say you’re supposed to do or not do. You have to follow the law,” Zent said when he read the sentence for Chris Graber.
He pointed out that Chris Graber was 25 to 27 years old when he raped an 11 to 13 year old and it was a “repeated crime.”
In James Graber’s sentencing, he noted it was a different crime, but also a repeat offense that negatively impacted the victim.
“It’s not a mistake, it’s a crime and there are consequences for your actions,” Zent told him.
No doubt the community will rally around these two men who will find prison life lonely and dangerous. It depends on where they are assigned.
Many sex offenders get sent to New Castle Correctional Facility because they are attacked in other facilities, according to popular opinion.
The courtroom scene seemed particularly humiliating for Chris Graber who must sit for another sentencing this week.
He rose from his seat next to Ridenour in anguish and continued to wrench in shame as the handcuffs were put on him and he walked out of the courtroom.
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